Very expensive meetings of Employers, Parents, Government and Teachers have agreed that School and Family should teach children more than just the skills to pass examinations. Well qualified young people are not welcome in adult life and employment unless they are also pleasant people who are able to work with others productively in positive relationships.
This awareness led to the S.E.A.L initiative which listed 50 desirable skills/abilities that Parents and Teachers should be teaching and that children must learn, develop and demonstrate. Children learn most quickly by following the good example of Parents and Teachers so it is most important that adults demonstrate, themselves, the skills that they expect children to learn from them.
The 50 desired S.E.A.L outcomes are listed below in 5 key areas so that we can all think of them and discuss them regularly with our children whilst giving them the model of our good example.
50 S.E.A.L. Skills and Learning Outcomes
- I know that I am a unique individual, and I can think about myself on many different levels (e.g. physical characteristics, personality, attitudes, values, etc.)
- I can identify my strengths and feel positive about them.
- I can identify my current limitations and try to overcome them.
- I recognise when I should feel pleased with and proud of myself and am able to accept praise from others.
- I can identify what is important for me and what I expect from myself, taking into account the beliefs and expectations that others (e.g. friends, family, school staff) have of me.
- I can reflect on my actions and identify lessons to be learned from them.
- I can make sense of what has happened to me in my life and understand that things that come from my own history can make me prone to being upset or angry for reasons others may find difficult to understand.
- I know and accept what I am feeling, and can label my feelings.
- I understand why feelings sometimes ‘take over’ or get out of control and know what makes me angry or upset.
- I understand that the way I think affects the way I feel, and that the way I feel can affect the way I think and know that my thoughts and feelings influence my behaviour.
- I can recognise conflicting emotions and manage them in ways that are appropriate.
- I can use my knowledge and experience of how I think, feel and respond, to choose my own behaviour, plan my learning, and build positive relationships with others.
- I can express my emotions clearly and openly and in ways appropriate to situations.
- I understand that how I express my feelings can have a significant impact both on other people and on what happens to me.
- I have a range of strategies for managing impulses and strong emotions so they do not lead me to behave in ways that would have negative consequences for me or for other people.
- I know what makes me feel good and know how to help myself have a good time (e.g. to feel calm, elated, energised, focused, engaged, have fun, etc.) – in ways that are not damaging to myself and others.
- I understand how health can be affected by emotions and know a range of ways to keep myself well and happy.
- I have a range of strategies to reduce, manage or change strong and uncomfortable feelings such as anger, anxiety, stress and jealousy.
- I can set goals and challenges for myself, set criteria for success and celebrate when I achieve them.
- I can break a long-term plan into small, achievable steps.
- I can anticipate and plan to work around or overcome potential obstacles.
- I can monitor and evaluate my own performance.
- I can look to long-term not short-term benefits and can delay gratification (e.g. working hard for a test or examination now to get a good job or into further/higher education later).
- I know how to bring about change in myself and others.
- I can view errors as part of the normal learning process, and bounce back from disappointment or failure.
- I can identify barriers to achieving a goal and identify how I am going to overcome them.
- I can choose when and where to direct my attention, resisting distractions and can concentrate for increasing periods of time.
- I can use my experiences, including mistakes and setbacks, to make appropriate changes to my plans and behaviours.
- I have a range of strategies for helping me to feel and remain optimistic, approaching new tasks in a positive way.
- I can take responsibility for my life, believe that I can influence what happens to me and make wise choices.
- I can work out how people are feeling through their words, body language, gestures and tone.
- I understand that people can all feel the same range of emotions, but that people do not necessarily respond in the same way to similar situations, and that different people may express their feelings in many different ways.
- I can see the world from other people’s points of view, taking into account their intentions, preferences, and beliefs and can feel with and for them.
- I can listen empathically to others, and have a range of strategies for responding effectively in ways that can help others feel better.
- I can show respect for people from diverse cultures and backgrounds, and for people with diverse interests, attainments, attitudes, and values, and I am interested in, enjoy and celebrate differences.
- I understand the impact of bullying, prejudice and discrimination on all those involved (including people who bully, people who are bullied and people who witness bullying, and others such as friends, family and wider community) and can use appropriate strategies to support them.
- I can support others who are experiencing personal problems.
- I recognise and take account of my feelings of empathy and act on them by considering the needs and feelings of others.
- I can communicate effectively with others, listening to what others say, as well as expressing my own thoughts and feelings.
- I can take others’ thoughts and feelings into account in how I manage my relationships.
- I can assess risks and consider the issues involved before making decisions about my personal relationships.
- I can make, sustain and break friends without hurting others.
- I can work and learn well in groups, taking on different roles and cooperating with others to achieve a joint outcome.
- I understand my rights and responsibilities as an individual who belongs to many different social groups, such as my friendship group, school class, school, family and community.
- I can achieve an appropriate level of independence from others, charting and following my own course while maintaining positive relationships with others.
- I can give and receive feedback and use it to improve mine and other people’s achievements.
- I can use a range of strategies to solve problems and know how to resolve conflict with other people, such as mediation and conflict resolution.
- I can monitor the effectiveness of different problem-solving strategies and use my experiences to help me to choose my behaviour and make decisions.
- I have strategies for repairing damaged relationships.
- I can be assertive when appropriate.